I near the end of this blog. This volume of thoughts that permeated so many days weeks and months. This book that was both a love story and a desperate race against time. A race essentially to say all that Karen and I had to say to each other before an end that we both knew was near. How near it was neither of us suspected. She told me she was done days before her death yet she had me order her a nightgown and a pair of buttery soft pants because her skin was so tender. They arrived after her death as a reminder of the things we can never know. One thing about her cancer is that we had time to prepare; to say goodbye. It was a blessing and a curse. We lived with the knowledge that one would have to die and one would have to live. This was our path and we walked it together these past months knowing that there was a fork in that path and it would come soon. The night before she died she asked me me to lie with her in her hospice bed and tell her stories; tell her stories of all the good times. I kissed her then I told those stories until late into the night as she fell asleep. We said our goodbyes and went to our separate destinies. A celebration of her life is planned for this Saturday. I hope I've invited everyone. She didn't want to be mourned she wanted for those who knew her to have a party. So I will commit her ashes in the morning and later we will celebrate. The example of Karen's grace and courage will help me to throw off burdens and lamentations and continue to the final chapter. Photo - William Evertson - Karen's memorial, a garden bench
7 Comments
Richard Sturm
5/24/2017 12:52:35 pm
Think about her the tome. Great lady and you were a great husband. She will always be missed
Reply
1/19/2018 04:33:28 pm
Cancer took another angel again. I wish I could kick cancer, so that it will not make people's lives miserable. I lost my father to cancer and it was the most heartbreaking thing ever. Unlike you, we were not able to say goodbye because when we found out, it was already at stage 4. It was already too late and I just hate how cancer comes without warning. It takes away your loved one in an instant leaving you empty.
Reply
12/6/2018 05:11:14 pm
There is one thing that I have read in the net and it says “What if the cure for cancer is stocked in the mind of those children who has no capacity to pay for education?” It really hit me, only if we can do something in order to get a cure. I lost my parent-in-law because of cancer. It is really hard for me having to miss them and at the same time, it is hard for me to see my husband being sad because he misses his mother and father.
Reply
Susan Shulman
5/24/2017 01:53:58 pm
Love knows no boundaries and the love ❤️ you have for each other lives on
Reply
You have written the most beautiful tributes to Karen, exposing love for what it is in its most vulnerable state, as well as its most invincible. Blessings on both of you forever.
Reply
Lea
5/24/2017 02:27:25 pm
You have said and done everything so beautifully..admire you both greatly!!
Reply
Bibi
5/24/2017 04:22:13 pm
♥
Reply
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorWilliam and Karen - Karen and I have been married for 41 years. Karen's breast cancer has reached stage 4. This is what happens next. Archives
May 2017
Categories |